29 January 2012 // 6:58 PM
♣ Last day being 17.
Yes, the title says it all. Today is my last day being seventeen. I will turn 18 in a few more hours. And I'm really hoping that it will be a start of something new for me. The legal age.
I hope, tomorrow will turn out to be a good day. And that my practical exam will turn out to be just fine (Yes, how unlucky right? To have an exam on my birthday). Also, that my hip hop showcase will turn out just fine and I won't embarrass myself in front of all the people who will be watching.
Now moving on to what's really bothering me. All this while, I've been trying to convince myself, that as long as he doesn't have a girl friend, I'm fine. Plus, maybe he's just the shy type who doesn't rush into things. But guess what I found out? He's been hitting on other girls. And what's worst, I actually know that girl. When my friend broke that news to me, it feels like someone literally stabbed my heart with a knife, it was that painful. At that point of time, I don't even care I was at co-op, I don't even care if people are watching, all I wanna do is just cry. Thank god, we actually went to the toilet, and I just hugged her and cry my heart out. After which, I just felt numbed. Also, now when I look at the girl, I just feel like cringing. I know it's not her fault that he falls for her, but I really can't help it.
Why her? What does she have that I don't? Is she really better than me? Prettier than me? Slimmer than me? Is she flawless?
All the thoughts ran through my mind. I just can't shut it out.Also on that day, I found out that the guy that I'm talking to is also actually attached as well. IT puzzles me why he still talked to me though, maybe he's just being friendly? Looks like I'm the one at the losing end of the stick.
I really need to learn to stand on my two feet. I can survive this. It will turn out just fine.
Everything will fall into place. Once I get rid of this heavy feeling in my heart,
everything will be perfect. I just need to bear with it for now.
Also, yesterday, Malathi and Louie. Had a pre-birthday celebration with me. Malathi baked really cute cupcakes for me, with the help of her cousin Priya. Guess what did Louie and Malathi bought for me? They got me the perfect clubbing outfit! Match with really awesome wedges. I love them both. They really want me to have an awesome experience. Sad that I can't celebrate on the actual day with them ):
I heard that my poly clique are gonna bash me. So nervous. I really hope that they're just kidding, coz I ain't gonna bring extra clothes tomorrow :/
And if they really MUST bash me, please do so after the show case. Thank you very much.
